梦

她去了海边，
那是个黄昏，橘红色的圆体徘徊在天与海之间，
隐隐约约在消失，
却藏不住孤独的不舍，
就像她此刻的心情。


海水无情的打在她脚丫，
笑了笑，
无所谓。


黑色的长发，
白色的薄纱，
随风飘呀，飘呀，
衬托在这即将来临的夜，
形成一种迷糊，浪漫的美。

她不哭，
因为她知道此刻的她一定很美，很美。
她就要卸下所有回忆，
脱掉丑恶，肮脏的身躯，
找回空白，纯洁的自己。

夜取代了明，
月取代了日，
在闭上眼的那一刻，
她还没搞清，
究竟谁来取代她。。。

天意

我以为我会永远忘不了他的号码。。。。。。
我记得的手机号码也只有一只手那么多。
1） 爸爸
2） 哥哥
3） 鸟类
4） 利
5） 初恋

我以为我永远都忘不了这五个号码。。。。。

前阵子，我一直学着忘了他（5）甚至他的号码。可是天意弄人，我越想忘记却越记得。。

前几天偷懒，看了溏心风暴，戏里的小鲍说了那么一句。。。

“如果有天你能放下所有悲伤，好好的活下去，以后不管我去了哪里，都会高兴到掉眼泪，而这些眼泪掉下来都会化成彩色雨，逗你开心。”

这不是他之前告诉过我的吗？
可是他要表达的对象不是我。。。。

如果他是戏里的男主角，那女的就会是那女主角。。。。。
而我呢，只是个观看，聆听的观众。。。。
戏落幕后，拍拍屁股，偷偷拭着眼泪，转身走人。

突然很想念他，按下熟悉的号码。。。（虽然已经把他的号码给洗了），
发了信息给他。。。。
他一直没有回我信息。
过了几天才发现原来我竟然发错信息了。
也因此认识了另个他。。。

这几天我一直都在努力，就是记不起他的号码。。
我和他的故事就酱画下句号了。
又是天意弄人吗？

Goodbye yesterday

i thought i will never saw hin anymore.
but yesterday i went n met him again,but not more than 5 minutes i guess...
yesterday were his 19 years old birthday,n i hav sumthing 4 him.
it was a teddy bear and a diary.
i attracted by tis bear when i first saw it,coz it realy looks like him.
tats y i bought it.
then i found a slightly green colour 's diary book, wrote all my feeling down,n de little things tat i havent told him b4....
he like 2 wrote me poems,n i juz keep ignore it.
but de fact was i 4get 2 told him,i was touched at tat moment....
de memory had meaningless now....

i noe all my friends blame me .....n said tat i was 2 stupid...
he keep hurting me n i still treat him nicely....
my dear friends,do u guys noe wats de meaning bout tat present?
i want 2 put him down,n 4get hm.
i wrote all de things down...try 2 throw tat rubish memory out of my mind...
then easier me 2 4get him..
n de teddy bear was him...
i oredi gave him de bear,tats means i put him down,n will 4get him ever n ever...
tats wat i means.
hope u guys will understand me.
Goodbye yesterday,
Goodbye to my first love........ws

我是乖乖女

我来自吉打的一个小新村。从小我就被这里的auntie uncle标上“乖乖女”的衔头。但我自认不乖咯。。。朋友都叫我kaki shopping的。。哈哈因为我在吉隆坡。。一个星期最少都shopping两次吧。。。读护士压力大嘛。。。我出去散散心不算过分吧。。。(好烂的借口-_-''')不过我玩归玩，我也是有读书的。。目前成绩还保持不错的。。。而且我绝对没有夜生活。。（出去玩也要找个理由安慰自己，好让自己安心-_-''''）话说回来，为什么他们会把我归类成“乖乖女”呢？因为哦。。。。。。原因超多的。。。我从小到大成绩还差不多啦。。。常常陪家人出去啦。。。不曾旷课。。。面对长辈都会打招呼。。或微笑。。。等等。。。
上学期回来就发生了这么一件事。。。。那天。我刚从北海学车回来。。。已经超累了。。。我妈咪难得在家。。。（她的social life赢过我）。。。她突然接近我。。。。我开始闻到来自她身上的杀气。。。。所以我准备转身就蹿进房间。。说时迟，那时快。。。我还是来不及。。。（悔恨啊！！！）
“慈，等下八点陪我去跳排舞啊。。。”
“咪啊，我很累耶。。。你自己去啦。。。”
“噢，那你自己休息一下，我们八点再过去。。。” （简直没有把我的话听进去嘛。）
“。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。”
“去运动运动对你有好处的。。。就酱说定。。”
“哦。。。。。。。” （你以为你第一年生下我啊，我会不懂你目的吗。。。唉。。。）
结果我真的心不甘，情不愿跟妈咪过去了。。一到场，全部都是auntie级的。。闷。。。。
“哇，你女儿酱孝顺啊，难的假期回来也陪你来练舞。。。。”
“还好啦，我不会跳嘛，女儿在身旁可以教我嘛。。。” （终于说出心声了）
“你就好啦，等下也叫你女儿教我哦。。。”
我突然发现我妈咪的脸好像在发光。。。。（我散光了吗？）
教练发现我的表现不错。。。
“你女儿跳得很好噢，下次我没来，她可以当你们的教练啦。。。”
“她年轻嘛，而且从小就跳舞了。。哈哈。不过她也要回去吉隆坡读书了。。。”。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。。我妈咪的脸比刚才更亮了。。。。-_-'''
昨天我刚回来家里，auntie们收风还真快。。。我昨天到家就收到蛋糕。。。其中一个auntie拿来的。。。今天又有蛋糕吃。。。下午还有auntie特地去买榴莲给我。。。傍晚去夜市也有uncle请我喝水。。。突然很期待明天会有什么。。。哈哈这就是“乖乖女”的好处吗？虽然我不是合格的乖乖女啦。。各位。不好意识咯。。。。。

《夜》

今天ceo来找我聊，
看她几乎天天去约会，
然后带着甜甜的味道回来，
好羡慕哦......
P/S:当我在炎热的下午，吃着可口的芒果冰的时候都没有她酱甜的表情哦～

今天和她在很美的夜色下聊，
手机传来张惠妹的《听海》，
突然好想念海......很想念那带点咸咸又涩涩的海风吹过我的头发，我的脸庞......

是不是我不漂亮，不够温柔，不够贤惠，不够气质，不够好......
我每一晚都如此质问自己......
所以到现在我的感情还是一张白张，是单纯？还是蠢蛋？......是后者吧？

吉隆坡的夜还是如往常一样灿烂，亮亮的，很像小时候偷开妈妈的珠宝盒里的首饰一样亮...
可是我天天都在偷窥着它的孤独，就像它天天都在看透我心灵的空虚一样吧...

Dating?

Last sunday,i went a date with my first love.
He said i was pink 4 him...so i wearing a pink dress.....my roomate n o de friends said tat i look very nice....like a sweet desert..haha...
We watched a movie..called...Blood; de last vampire...
very scary u noe..but he juz keep laughing at me...when i was xxxtimes scared by tat movie..

B4 de movie...we went 4 breakfast...i think...although it was 10.30am dy...
i hav a hot drink..n de hot drink juz nicely fit in a china cup...
Both of us were 2 quite...
2 pairs of eyes juz focus on de scene outside.....
Once i drinking my tea....i suddenly remember a poem like tis...

"I wish i was de china cup,
from which u drink ur tea,
for then i noe at every sup,
u will give a kiss 2 me."

Romantic ,rite?

But i think i will not be de china cup for de person who sit beside me..
y?
He dun want me 2 be his china cup.

Touch or sad story?

I am a student nurse..i would like 2 share a story here...
A young guy was ammitted 2 my hospital here because of having great injury on his right hand n oso right leg...
b4 tis he was ammitted to 2 different hospitals...
but doctors there not realize tat 4 fingers of his right hand were break up dy.
when he 3rd times ammitted 2 my hospital now,de surgeons here try hard 2 connected back his fingers.
i still remember de surgeons said they took 21hours to save his 4 fingers,but finally oso failed.
Tat guy totally not my patient,but i noe him while i was following de doctors's round.
Coz oredi no blood circulation on de 4 of de fingers,de doctors adviced him 2 cut off tat fingers.
if not ,he will getting infection.
oh my god,if cutting off 4 of de fingers,means tat juz left one thumb on his right hand only!
he cant receive de truth...
i feel sad when i noe his story...
i try 2 get him n talk 2 him.
n he seems like me,talk a lot with me...
finally he made a decision...cutting off de useless fingers...
so sad...
he ask me..wat should he do after tis..
he cant work anymore..n he still young..
i speechless.
de operation done two days ago..
i still remember de staff frm operation room called at 2pm.
i ask de permissions frm staff nurse incharge who r take care of him 2 send him 2 operation room.
outside de operation room,while wearing him operation cap,i ask him..
afraid o not?
he answer me with smile...
no...
y?
coz i noe u r beside me....
...........
wait me back ya....
......ok.....gud luck....
then i go back....
i feel sad..n oso touch...
i really dun understand,how cum a person who r going 2 lose his fingers still can smile....
i think i learn a lot from him...
but i scared 2 think about his future after he step out from de operation room...like now...